Well, what with all this mad crazy summery sunshine (did you catch the perfume smog that enveloped the centre on Sunday, along with all the heat-maddened shiny shirt zombies jumping out into the roads?), I’ve having a quiet evening in with the fan on full blast (okay, if we’re being strictly honest, it’s on the first setting of three, but sheesh, get over yourself with the to-the-letter truthfulness) and a cruise through some all-time favourites. Tomorrow will be misspent drinking al fresco, methinks, so tonight is all about the chill.
Hence An American Werewolf In London. (And yes, I am aware I’ve done this before. It’s simply a fucking awesome film, though.)
AAWWIL: Lunar cycling through 28 reasons why it is the wolf’s bollocks
- Jenny Agutter. As a nurse. “Nurse Price shall see to all your needs” indeed! And lest we forget, “You put me in a very awkward position…”
- Waking up naked in London Zoo, and the exchange with the deadpan balloon kid…
- Brian Glover in his prime – post-Kes, pre-Tetley.
- The whole crossover angle with the Muppets!
- The way David and Jack’s backstories are only ever implied, and yet we still get a sense of who they are – like the banter at the beginning, and David’s brief conversation over the phone with his ten year old sister (okay, ten-and-a-half year old sister) to say goodbye, after he’s decided to commit suicide – of which we only hear one end.
- Dr Hirsch trying to order a Campari and soda at the Slaughtered Lamb (where, we may remember, they serve only beer, spirits and tea), and his subsequently rising and falling half of Guinness.
- The soundtrack – only five tracks, three of them different versions of the same song, but all moon-related, and all fitting perfectly into the film.
- See You Next Wednesday, the porno movie-within-a-movie, and the ‘Naughty Nina Carter’ News Of The World TV advert.
- The dude from the American Embassy trying to talk to a majorly freaked out David – “I appreciate how upset you are, but this is no reason for hysterics!” Because waking up in hospital following an attack by a werewolf which has killed your best friend and turned you into a lycanthrope really needs to be put into perspective…
- The Underground chase – how terrifying is that, and with no gore! “I can assure you that this is not in the least bit amusing!”
- The Slaughtered Lamb – a typically inviting northern hostelry. Probably a three star gastropub these days.
- “I think he’s a Jew…”
- Taking the piss out of postcard punks on the Tube.
- Benjamin, the smiley kid in the hospital who would only say ‘no’.
- “The police say they were attacked by an escaped lunatic…”
- Elmer Bernstein’s frantic cues (sounding not a little like they were recycled from The Great Escape, which is no bad thing).
- “If I survived Rommel, I’m sure I could survive another excruciating evening with Roger Matheson!” You tell her, Dr Hirsch
- Superintendent Brownlow, the louche Sun Hill commanding officer in The Bill, turning up as the constable in Trafalgar Square who won’t arrest a guilt-stricken, upset David, despite his treasonous and Tourette’s-like outbursts (“Queen Elizabeth is a man! Princes Charles is a faggot! Shit! Fuck! Cunt! Shit!”)
- “You ever talk to a corpse? It’s boring!”
- The clumsy copper who knocks over the kidney dishes and annoys his guvnor being, in essence, completely correct about everything.
- The wild venison buffet.
- The increasingly shocking nightmare scenes (as teefed for Weird Science?), with proper jump-out-your-seat moments.
- “But there’s only one bed…” Crikey!
- A dead and decomposing Jack – “a walking meatloaf” – constantly appearing and trying to convince David to kill himself before he completely turns.
- The exuberant (and still convincing, in small doses) make-up and effects, and especially David’s terrifying first full transformation, to the tune of Blue Moon. And the inspiration for this blog’s header logo.
- The cabbie – “Puts you in mind of the days of the old Demon Barber of Fleet Street, dunnit…”
- The Piccadilly Circus finale – total carnage!
- Did I mention Jenny Agutter? As a nurse?
“It’s a full moon…”
[Chorus] “Beware the moon”
“…And stick to the road… [Looks down] …Oooops…”
To those finding this page after googling ‘who said, “you made me miss” in a movie?‘, the chap you’re looking for is David Schofield, who turned in an equally menacing turn in Our Friends In The North, where he played bent copper John Salway.