Headline Of The Day: Star Wars Baddie On Big Brother Goody

From the Evening Post, naturally.

The ’story’ continues:

He revealed his illness earlier this week on Absolute Radio in an attempt to raise money for the Royal Marsden Hospital in London.

Speaking from his home in Croydon, Surrey, he said: ”I now know what it’s like to go through this treatment, and I have sympathy for anyone in the same position.

”Jade should be commended for her achievements, and should be thoroughly proud of raising the awareness of cervical cancer.

”She has done more than anyone else in memory to convince women to go for regular tests.”

Married father-of-three Prowse, who stands 6′7” tall, added: ”If I can do the same for prostate cancer in men, then I will be happy.”

Body-builder Prowse was chosen to play the villain in Star Wars in 1976, but because of his West Country accent the character’s lines were spoken by the deep-voiced American actor James Earl Jones.

He told Absolute Radio’s Christian O’Connell that he was making good progress and felt ”fantastic” despite his condition.

He said: ‘I’m undergoing treatment for prostate cancer, would you believe. I’m having my very last treatment this morning.

”I’ve had two months of radiotherapy at the Royal Marsden. It’s the most fantastic hospital. I feel fantastic, no problems whatsoever.”

Jade, 27, spent Sunday with her two sons Freddie, four, and Bobby Jack, five, her mum Jackiey (corr) Budden, 50, and her 21-year-old hubby Jack Tweed.

She has already made full arrangements for her funeral, which she hopes will be a ‘celebration’ of her life.

Jackiey said: ”It’s not day by day now. It’s more like hour by hour.”

Leaving the sub’s note on spelling in there is a nice touch, adds that gritty realism that the story demands.

Piss & Vinegar #047: Reds

That doesn’t look good… John Reed (Warren Beatty) passes blood whilst in the cells in Reds.

Screen Surgery & Film First Aid #001: Shooter

Arrrgh! I’ve been shot! But as I’ve been framed for an assassination I didn’t commit and am a fugitive from law enforcement, I can’t go to a hospital until I’ve cleared my name!

Fortunately I’m a retired Scout Sniper with a whole lot of Marine Corps training, so I reckon I can patch myself up till I can get me some proper medical attention. Having stolen an FBI car, I have a whole first aid kit to rummage around in. Let’s have a look see…

Aha! QuikClot! Just the job…

QuikClot is

a granular product that [is] poured directly on wounds to stop bleeding. It works by adsorbing water from the blood, concentrating the clotting factors, activating platelets, and promoting steps in the coagulation cascade. It is composed of zeolite, a molecular sieve that traps molecules in a molecular “cage” and holding the trapped species by forming hydrogen bonds. The bond formation generates heat…

Generates heat?! Arrrgh!!!

*Nearly faints*

“Just one more thing…”

So it wasn’t common-or-garden forgetfulness, and it wasn’t genius sleuthing, it was just Alzheimer’s…

Columbo – the only honest cop.

Keep on banging up those greedy rich bastards!

Non-Ladybird endorsed youth sex-ed!

Following the chortleworthy détournement shenanigans of the not-Banksy Ladybird Book People At Work: The Policeman comes Boys And Girls (“A short book about choosing if and when to have sex”), jointly published by NHS Greater Glasgow & Clyde, NHS Lanarkshire and NHS Ayrshire and Arran (and “not in any way associated, endorsed or connected to or with Ladybird Books Limited“, guv’nor)!

I think it’s rather sweet, especially with the Claire Grogan-ish narration

(Tip o’ the titfer: Sexocentric)

HonkWatch #040: The Wire (S1E11)

Not much to say except IIRC this is McNulty seasoning a hospital trashcan after Kima’s shooting in the first series of The Wire.

(And seeing as I’m working through all of Homicide: Life On The Street at the moment, I think I’d definitely give The Wire the points decision over its Bawlmore crime antecedent – the impeccable first two series aside, H:LOTS definitely showed too many signs of sharkjumpage past the third season mark.)

From Here To Shiternity #004: Oz (S4E12)

We’re well past the shark-jumping point (the second half of the fourth season through the most of the fifth and sixth are all pretty weak compared with the early stuff), but still there are minor treats along the way (let’s try and forget Hamlet, the IRA subplot and the rubbish new Italians).

Here we have Miguel Alvarez unravelling in solitary, and engaging in a bit of Bobby Sands-style interior design. Keen on the umbers, siennas and russets, that lad.

“Don’t Tase me, bro!” – killer virus epidemic goes musical

Some Andrew Meyer/University of Florida Tasering tunes…

See also here, here, here, here and, erm, here…

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Tased & Confused: Now in full audio glory!

Lots of people have been arriving here looking for audio of the Andrew Meyer University of Florida Taser incident: Well, ye who googles shall receive…

Direct linkies:*

• Long version (mp3)
• Medium version (mp3)
• Short version (mp3) (just the “Don’t Tase me, bro!” bit)

* For them wot can’t figure out how to strip the audio off the page

** Audio links now fixed! **

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“Don’t Tase me, bro!”

Wired has been following the University of Florida stun gun incident with interest:

• The term ['Don't Tase me, bro!', as uttered by Andrew Meyer] hovered between 9th and 11th place as the most searched for term on Google for Wednesday, according to Google Trends.
• The above video has been the number 1 Viral Video for the past 24 hours, according to Unruly Media, an online marketing firm in London that tracks viral video activity on the Web. The Meyer arrest video has received 2.6 million views and almost 40,000 new comments since Monday.
• In contrast, the much-talked about MoveOn.org’s “Betrayal of Trust,” anti-Rudy Giuliani ad received just over 171 thousand views and 59 new blog posts. And John Edwards’ rebuttal to President Bush’s progress report on the Iraq war received 114 thousand views and 43 new posts.
• Many of the leading opinion shapers on both the left and the right, as well as newspaper blogs, offered their thoughts and insights on the incident.
• Television pundits across the dial offered their opinions, and those opinions were archived for posterity on YouTube.
• Several enterprising individuals have even snapped up variations of the spelling of the phrase as Web addresses. One of them points to a Wikipedia entry for the University of Florida.
• Someone has already created a mashup.
• A couple of t-shirt designs, and bumper stickers have emerged.
• Dozens of people have felt compelled to record their own video responses in a YouTube forum discussion on the matter.

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Stunning dissidence

This might ‘educate’ and/or ‘amuse’ our friend Chief Inspector Andy Bennett: On Monday student Andrew Meyer asked John Kerry why he conceded the 2004 election to Bush at a talk delivered by the former Democratic presidential candidate at the University of Florida. Police then tried to drag Meyer out of the hall, handcuffed him, Tasered him and told him he was being arrested for “incitement to riot”!

CNN reports that two campus cops “have been placed on leave with pay.”

The Florida Division of Law Enforcement will investigate Monday’s arrest of student Andrew Meyer, said J. Bernard Machen. Machen called the incident “regretful for us.”

“The thing that I regret is that civil dialogue and civil discourse did not happen,” Machen said. “That’s fundamental to a university campus. Why it didn’t happen is what we’re trying to sort out.”

Naturally Meyer was charged with “resisting officers with violence and for disturbing the peace,” before being released on Tuesday.

More info: Gainsville Sun

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Idiots with fireworks

Ooops -I think some plank somewhere in BS2 may have just burnt their eyebrows off, judging by the number of fireworks all going off simultaneously a minute ago… Remember kids, keep your crackers in a biscuit tin