Category Archives: Shecks & Shecksuality

Birds, bees and all things twixt

On cop-spies and paid betrayers (1.1): Lambert’s a bottler – sex-pest cop-spook “startled” by hecklers

A little update on Special Branch spy-turned-touchy-feely ‘academic’ Bob Lambert – there’s a report on IndyMedia about a talk by him being disrupted by animal rights activists:

…Bob Lambert poses as a ‘progressive academic’ and sat on a panel at his home university, the University of St. Andrews, for a talk titled ‘Overcoming Obstacles: Counter-Terrorism Police and Community Engagement.’ Several activists leafleted the talk outside handing out leaflets that read:

Do you think it’s alright to…trick someone into a romantic relationship so that you can spy on them and their friends?…lie to them and everyone else about your identity in order to do so?…maintain this pretence of love and trust for more than a year? …have a child with your deceived ‘partner’ and then abandon the child for decades while concealing your identity from them?

Robert Lambert, the man speaking before you seems to think that this is acceptable behaviour for a public servant. He engaged in all of them during his years as an officer with the Metropolitan Police, sent to spy on peaceful environmental and animal rights campaigns. Perhaps this is Lambert’s idea of ‘community engagement.’

Is it yours?

As soon as Bob Lambert started his talk two animal rights activists stormed out after shouting and pointing at Bob Lambert phrases like, ‘shame!’, ‘where is your son, Bob?’ and ‘sex is not community engagement!.’ Audience members reported him as startled and mumbled the first section of his speech.

We were thrilled.

We challenge the State’s use of womyn’s bodies; all animals are equal regardless of gender or species.

Go vegan.

[Signed] off the pig

Meanwhile, Lambert – AKA Robert Lambert MBE, AKA Bob Robinson – has put up something of a mea culpa on his University of St. Andrews page, in which he shamelessly plugs his recent book (which, comment junkies, has yet to receive a review on Amazon

In his own words:

I always knew that if details of my earlier role as an undercover police officer became public my own credibility and integrity would come under close scrutiny.

…Understandably, that anger towards my deception intensifies when considering the cases of relationships that male undercover police officers, myself included, are alleged to have had with women. These cases are now the subject of civil litigation and therefore I should wait for the outcome of these legal proceedings before adding to the public apology I have made already. I should also wait for the outcome of several investigations and reviews of undercover policing in general before commenting more widely on the topic. I am also keen to ensure that the security and welfare of many brave and faultless undercover police officers is not compromised.

Yet when he says “covert policing – especially undercover policing – is a tactic [that is] reserved for those engaged in political violence of one kind or another” it clearly does not match his own infiltration of London Greenpeace, nor his protégé Jim Boyling’s embedding in Reclaim The Streets.

The limp apology (or rather pre-apology) Lambert proffers in relation to the sex-by-deceit aspect of these undercover spy-cop operations is not helped by his failure to even acknowledge his own child.

Lambert’s claim that he has “learned from mistakes as well as successes all my life and will probably continue to do so” is somewhat undermined by the disjointed way these sorts of wishy-washy words match with what is actually known about his actions; that is to say the words do not match the actions.

Whether this is a shameless attempt to bail out the leaky professional life raft that is his pseudo-academic niche as ‘the copper who got chummy with some Muslims’, or heartfelt but flawed candour remains to be seen.

SEXISTPUNDITGATE: Andy Gray’s strip for young boys REVEALED!

This Andy Gray sexism thing – so I bought some old comics recently, the first few editions of DC Thomson’s early eighties boys’ paper Buddy, issue one of which came out thirty years ago, on 14 February 1981.

One of the strips is the ‘Super Personality Series’, a two page cartoon biography of a famous person (Sting, Kenny Dalglish, Kevin Keegan, Jimmy Savile, Barry Sheene – you get the picture); and in the first issue who should it be but Andy Gray, following him from his schooldays (“I must get my four Highers. A good education could be a help in later years”) through to Cup Final success in 1980.

Click the pic to see the strip full size.

“Sex-change-paedo”: Tactless Telegraph tagger strikes again!

The tags put on Telegraph stories that come up on my blogreader are often of a particularly fruity nature; this one’s the best I’ve seen recently, from a story about a transsexual woman who has just been convicted of downloading child porn:

Laura Voyce, 20, who has changed her name from Luke, could have been locked up for nine months after being convicted of 14 counts of downloading indecent images of children.

But Judge Lesley Newton chose to suspend the sentence after saying that she would be at risk of attack in prison.

Voyce, from Kirkby in Merseyside, is in the process of having a sex change to become a woman.

The court heard a stash of indecent images was found on Voyce’s computer by police investigating another allegation.

Perhaps the tactless tagging – worthy of the Star or the Express, for sure – is Will Lewis‘s own version of sticking sardines down the back of the radiator… Or does he have a cadre of stay-behind saboteurs in place?

Bristol City Council in asset stripping scandal!

News reaches the BunKRS that there’s a bunfight brewing over a possibly ill-judged decision to hire out of the Council-owned and managed City Museum for the launch party of a modern art showcase – featuring a striptease by noted burlesque star Dita Von Teese!

Furious emails have been bandied back and forth between “independent public policy professional” Helen Mott of the Bristol Fawcett Society and various council officers after she spotted a mention of a less-than-fully-clothed performance in Bristol on Dita’s website (whilst cruising for research purposes, no doubt). Disgruntled ex-council leader and current Labour group gauleiter Helen Holland has already scented the sweet smell of party political catnip and has spent the past few days stirring things up.

Asks Ms Mott, “What will be next, a private party at the Council House where the Black and White Minstrels are invited to perform?” Well, if the Tories’ Bunter Eddy has his way

The ‘strip show’ – which was to take place on Friday 30th April – appears to have been cancelled, though the exhibition is still set to start on Saturday 15th May. [ETA: It seems that the launch party will still be going ahead, just postponed.]

So far the LibDem leadership seems to have kept themselves out of the firing line, leaving the likes of Paul Taylor (head of the chief executive’s office) and licensing manager Pauline Powell to soak up the bullets, but with general election madness in the air, how long before it turns into another Coconutgate or Astley Fiasco? Especially as Powell has already dropped deputy leader Cllr Simon Cook in the shit by admitting he had been briefed about the issue before the two Helens got on the case…

ETA:

That bloody Barlow got his story up two minutes before mine, the swine! He’s also the one suggesting that Ms von Teese’s performance has been postponed, not cancelled.

The joy of Sex Bangla

Despite only having – very briefly – mentioned a blog called Sex Bangla a mere three weeks ago, for some reason daily traffic to the BunKRS has pretty much doubled thanks to Bangla sex-seeking surfers.

Nearly 500 visitors got here via the WordPress tag for Sex Bangla; more than 200 via various combinations of the search engine terms ‘sex’ and ‘Bangla’. My short mention of the subject is the second most popular post for October on this blog, and the fifth most popular of all time :o

Perhaps there’s a shortage of Bangla banging on the net, because at the moment it seems like everyone looking for it is coming via here, and I feel more than a little embarrassed that I don’t have any to share.

Oh, you poor Banglapornophiles, may your grotsearches prove eventually fruitful.

PS What sort of perverts come here in the vain hope of finding Anna Mendelson poetry?

Non-Ladybird endorsed youth sex-ed!

Following the chortleworthy détournement shenanigans of the not-Banksy Ladybird Book People At Work: The Policeman comes Boys And Girls (“A short book about choosing if and when to have sex”), jointly published by NHS Greater Glasgow & Clyde, NHS Lanarkshire and NHS Ayrshire and Arran (and “not in any way associated, endorsed or connected to or with Ladybird Books Limited“, guv’nor)!

I think it’s rather sweet, especially with the Claire Grogan-ish narration :D

(Tip o’ the titfer: Sexocentric)

Incoming! #001: Sex Bangla

Hot dance « Bangladeshi Cinema Sex Blog

Here some screen captures from widely available movie on internet. Do you know which?!

Headline Of The Day: ANTI-EMO RIOTS BREAK OUT ACROSS MEXICO

Mexican emo kids march against the wave of violence directed at them

WTF?!

Spotted on Wired:

A series of attacks on dyed-hair, eye-makeup-wearing emo kids began in early March when several hundred people went on an emo-beating rampage in Querétaro, a town of 1.5 million about 160 miles north of Mexico City. The next week, shaggy-haired emo kids were harassed again by punks and rockabillys in the capital, prompting police protection and a segment on the TV news. Most recently, a Mexican newspaper reported that metal heads and gangsters have warned Tijuana’s emo kids to stay away from the town’s fair next month.

But the emo kids are organizing, too. Daniel Hernandez of LA Weekly, who has provided stellar coverage of the whole affair, reports that emo teenagers are banding together. Last week, they marched against the violence, pictured above, and Wednesday some met with police in Mexico City.

…by some accounts, the emo subculture is identified with homosexuality in Mexico. As Mexico City youth worker Victor Mendoza told Time.com: “At the core of this is the homophobic issue. The other arguments are just window dressing for that.”

Forum posts show similar sentiments. One person wrote on a government youth-website forum, “detesto a los emosexuales,” which translates as “I hate emosexuals.” Emosexual is an obvious play on homosexual, especially in Spanish, where the H is silent.

(Photo: Mexican emo kids gather in response to anti-emo violence by metalheads and punk rockers. Credit: promrguez)

Bristol City Council: more homophobic than the Met

And, as is the way here in Britain’s biggest village, this apparently is A Good Thing, at least judging from the giddy excitement with which BCC has greeted its chart position in the Stonewall ‘Workplace Equality Index 2008’.

Stonewall chart

The survey shows that our good burghers were beaten in the cuddly boss stakes by no fewer than eight police forces, the screws service and even the Foreign Office (sections of which, lest we forget, have a habit of vetting for gay men and women), but judging from deputy leader Pudge Hammond’s response, this is good gravy:

Stonewall’s workplace equality index is an important external assessment and validation of this council as an employer of lesbian, gay and bisexual people. It tells us what we are doing well, and how we can improve our performance even further to attract and retain staff.

Bristol – because sometimes mere mediocrity is just too good.

The Di$neyland Memorial Orgy

Wally Woods’s Disneyland Memorial Orgy poster (colourised)

While reading up on Wally Wood and his involvement in the Warren Publishing comic lines (Creepy, Eerie etc) – via Russ Jones’s very interesting memoir of it – I came across a poster he did for Paul Krassner‘s magazine The Realist, entitled ‘The Disneyland Memorial Orgy‘.

Originally a black and white panorama, it was commissioned by Krassner shortly after Walt Disney’s death in the winter of 1967:

This was a few years after Time’s famous “God Is Dead” cover, and it occurred to me that Disney was indeed God to Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, Goofy — the whole crowd — he had been their creator and had repressed their baser instincts, but now they could shed all their inhibitions and participate in a magnificent mass binge.

Notes Wikipedia:

Only about a third of the 64 Disney characters depicted are actively involved in sexual intercourse or are on the point of undertaking it. Most are just observing the others. A few of the characters are occupied with other activities. A dazed Mickey Mouse, to the left in the bottom area, is plunging a syringe in his arm, while the paraphernalia of drug addicts lies at his feet. Next to him, an evil looking and grinning Pluto is urinating on a large painting of the eager face of Mickey. One of the small rabbits from Bambi is probably engaged in the sin of gluttony, featured licking an ice cream cone. In the upper left, Dumbo the flying elephant has just defecated on Donald Duck while in flight.

The wide activity of the scene and the panoramic view resembles the satires of William Hogarth or medieval depictions from such masters such as Hieronymus Bosch. The upper left portion is decorated with a few allusions to the lucrative nature of Walt Disney enterprises.

Pandora’s Box-fresh new soundtrack

Poster, PBSpotted a rather juicy looking event taking place here in Bristol in three weeks – a special screening of a classic silent movie complete with a never-been-publicly-played new score. The film’s Die Büchse Der Pandora (Pandora’s Box), featuring bobtastic Jazz Age icon Louise Brooks in a career-defining role as a free spirited and licentious woman in a pre-feminist world. At least, that’s what I think it’s about.

There’s all sorts of moralistic storytelling tropes, like the ‘bad’ woman wreaking havoc to all around her by refusing to conform to ‘conventional’ gender roles, amoral or immoral behaviour leading to downfall, the inevitable tragedy that leads on from unfettered pleasure-seeking, that sort of thing; but FFS, it’s Louise Brooks in her first big screen role! Unrepentant, unconventional, unbroken. A Clytemnestra or Medea or Antigone for early cinema. And that journey, from the blood myths and theatre of ancient Greece, through the Expressionism and ambiguities of Weimar Germany, to this movie (named as it is after the Greek Eve, with all the baggage which that carries, after all), is a potent, evocative one.

Pandora’s Box smallSorry, went a bit pretentious and whatnot. Anyhow, there’s lots of cinematic memes to get stuck into too, if you don’t dig tropes ;) – Jack The Ripper, ‘white slavery’, love triangles, all that jazz.

Back to the event. It’s being organised by Bristol Silents (which has support from the likes of the very nice Kevin Brownlow) and the Watershed (“Britain’s First Media Centre”, aka the Wankershit, contrasting nicely with the Analphoney across the harbour – cheers Andy :D ), and takes place at Colston Hall on Saturday 15th September. The new score is composed by Paul Lewis, and will be performed by minstrels from the Royal Ballet Sinfonia:

“The score is operatic and the melodies full-blooded,” he explained.

“In spite of this I am scoring it for a relatively small orchestra as I believe this gives greater intimacy and a closer connection with the individual characters.”

(From article on BBC Bristol website)

It’s a bit pricey though – £20. Tickets from the Colston Hall box office (0117 922 3686).

Linkies:

  • Criterion Collection – a 2-DVD box set, featuring mucho extras, 4 scores and contextual interviews
  • DVD Beaver – always-excellent resource on both technical quality of DVD editions and on the material itself

Pandora’s back

Sapph Pacific

IHLOF lips

I’ve just watched In Her Line Of Fire, directed by Brian Trenchard-Smith. It’s basically a lesbian action thriller, with Mariel Hemingway (an actor offering mucho gay film subtext, thanks to Personal Best) as Delaney, a Secret Service bodyguard trying to rescue the Vice President from kidnappers after their plane crashes near a remote Pacific island. The Veep is played by David Keith (not to be mistaken with Keith David) – possibly best known for acting psycho in Donald Cammell’s White Of The Eye, as well as paying-the-bill roles in things like The Two Jakes & Major League II, and we learn that he’s a straight-talking (ahem), honest ex-soldier, who served with Delaney in Gulf War 1. They share a comradely concern for each other, but the only sniff of sexual tension is – unusually for this genre – between Delaney and a young (female) reporter who was on board the plane when it crashed, Sharon Serrano (Jill Bennett). It definitely makes things run a bit more interestingly, because this is a run-of-the-mill actioner, though as the director, Brian Trenchard-Smith, has explained, there are two versions circulating, one being, if you will, a pink-reduced cut, which strips out all but the most subtle moments between the two women.

Aside from the lesbian angle, it’s all pretty straight forward: it’s set in the country of ‘San Pietro’, which is at one point described as being “in the Solomons”, although all the locals look or sound to me either Maori or Samoan (it was filmed in New Zealand/Aotorea). There’s some sort of civil war going on, with a rebel army holed up in the jungle of a small island, Barago, training to overthrow an unseen dictator, under the tutelage of a motley band of mercenaries. The mercenaries are led by an American, Armstrong (David Milbern), who is meant to be some sort of crazed psychopath, as well as a venal hired gun, and a piqued, cast-aside warrior (“my dad served two tours in Vietnam, my brother’s in a VA hospital in Virginia with stumps for legs”) – kind of a blend of Tommy Lee Jones (Under Siege), Bruce Payne (Passenger 57) and Ed Harris (The Rock). Only not as good, because for the most part he prats about like a muscle mary with roid rage.

The most interesting character for me was the actual rebel leader (or at least the most senior we see in the film), Petelo (Robbie Magasiva). Magasiva throws a whole load of seriousness into the part – he puts across very human qualities into what comes across as a thoroughly underwritten (or brutally over-edited) part. He’s full of rage and despair at the state of the country, yet he has himself compromised the struggle against the unnamed dictator by hiring a bunch of Western nutjobs, who swan about like feudal warlords. He also fails to assert more than the most basic authority in the camp – until a crucial turning point – choosing instead to act as an underling to his own sub-contractor… But yeah, he’s good. I’ve seen him before, in the Kiwi Lock, Stock-teefing Stickmen (pool supplanting poker). Deserves some decent parts he can make his own.

Sorry, I’m meandering. I wouldn’t say it’s a great film – not even in its genre – but it’s certainly interesting, and rattles along at a pace. The fight scenes aren’t the best, but they work, though it’s one of those movies where getting shot requires stunt dudes to do that throwing-their-feet-in-the-air thing, followed by the landing-on-their-backs-with-loud-grunt flourish. Ketchup-free GSW, all very A-Team. And talking of The A-Team, it also shares that whole overused location syndrome – you keep seeing the same stretch of river, the same trees in the jungle, the same beach, all the way through. Sure, the jeeps and bikes and rebels may be moving in different directions, but sometimes the camera seems to be in exactly the same place.

On a more positive note, the armourer seems to have had fun; I don’t think I’ve seen a Carl Gustaf M/45 in film since Uncommon Valor (or the wack last series of Tour Of Duty). And Brian Trenchard-Smith strikes me as a pretty imaginative genre director, who despite revelling in some clichés also avoids others (eg the ‘terrorist’ word is used only once, and only then in reference to the American mercenary). And yes, the use of a lesbian hero – without pretext, without excuses – is interesting, especially in a film that is not ‘worthy’.

In fact, BTS – who I’ve only really come across as the director of BMX Bandits and The Siege Of Firebase Gloria – appears to be a very approachable hack, judging by his posts on the IMDb message boards, discussing his work (I don’t use the word ‘hack’ as an insult, btw):

TIDES and IN HER LINE OF FIRE are gay-lite movies. I would have been happy to have made their gay issues more front and centre, but that would have involved additional shooting time and post production that the budgets would not cover. A gay and a straight version of each film was needed to recoup the cost from an international television market that is not particularly progressive. The straight version of each film recovered the lion’s share of the investment.
As a straight man, father of 2 sons, I was happy to make films with a message of tolerance. Gay people are just as capable of extreme acts of heroism as straight people. Sexual preference has no influence over courage. As a film maker I enjoy genre cocktails; so it amused me to do a Lesbian Rambo and a gay riff on Crimson Tide/Run Silent Run Deep. But the realities of the market place means the mixture must be created in 15 shooting days, 14 in the case of In Her Line Of Fire. And most people will end up seeing the straight less interesting version. C’est la vie.

From ‘Gay-themed action movie’?! (thread on Tides Of War IMDb message board)

So, erm, in conclusion – In Her Line Of Fire: worth catching, but don’t expect the best film ever, or even the best action film ever.

Linkies:

‘Gas Pump Girls’

Gas Pump GirlsI know it’s probably wrong on many levels, but I rather enjoyed watching Gas Pump Girls.

Plotwise, we have a bunch of rosy-cheeked American gals graduating from high school. One
of them, June, decides to look after her uncle’s service station when he gets ill, and she ropes in her four best pals, plus three geeky lads and a trio of T-Bird rejects. Along the way they come into conflict with neighbouring Mob-affiliated garage owner Mr Friendly, teach an oil magnate that capitalism needs to care about the small people too, and learn a whole stack of Sesame Street-style lessons in life, albeit ones that do seem to involve baring one’s bosom an awful lot.

It’s a kind of blend of Grease, Porky’s and Car Wash, except that despite the shameless “o noez her boobs iz xposed!!!” moments, it’s all rather sweet and that. I mean, reinforcing gender stereotypes notwithstanding ;-)

But at the same time, the women are centrestage throughout, it’s the women who come up with all the ideas, and the women who run the show.
It certainly feels less sleazy than the likes of American Pie.

Plus Tarantino clearly stole the K-Billy radio schtick from Cousin Brucie Morrow here :D